The following short rant appeared originally in Icon (issue 112) and I thought it worth posting up here as it's not appeared on-line before. The photograph is my own and nearly resulted in me being arrested.
Judged alongside their other ‘crimes’, the design of high street banks
would seem to rank pretty low. But my irritation at the state of their interiors
long predates Libor and government bailouts.
I have been going into my local HSBC for something like fifteen years,
during which time it has had numerous ‘facelifts’, each more awful than the
last. Matters are made worse by the fact that this particular branch is housed
in a fine, Edwardian building which has been defaced with polystyrene tiles,
crude strip lighting and clumsy spatial divisions. Hanging a suspended ceiling
below a beautiful, classical dome or driving a cheap partition into some
elegant timber mouldings, may not be a crime in every branch, but no bank is
entirely innocent.
There are common problems. One is the plethora of services and personnel
involved. As well as counter-staff there are people called ‘business advisors’
who lurk inside strange booths or perch on random, primary-coloured stools
offering pre-scripted advice. Then there are various people who merely mill
around the entrance area asking if you need to deposit a cheque or borrow
£50,000. The walls and much of the floor area is taken up with posters and
banners beseeching students to commit to a lifetime of customer loyalty in exchange
for some free headphones.
The essence of all this confusion lies in the fact that banks no longer
quite know what they are offering. Ultimately they would prefer to mutate into
an on-line only service, one where the customer is free to wander around in
virtual confusion with no staff to complain-to. However, they recognise that
people remain bewilderingly old-fashioned when it comes to where they put their
money and cling to the certainties offered by a man behind a counter and a biro
attached with a beaded metal chain.
The endless revamps, with their cheery fonts and cheesy furniture, mask
an underlying confusion at to what a high street banks’ actually for. It’s not
a shop, or an office, or an institution, but a strange hybrid of all three. The
result is a thoroughly dissonant experience combining the remnants of
old-fashioned service with the contemporary hysteria of full-on commercialism.
All this occurs within in an atmosphere of cheap’n’cheerful high street
branding shoehorned into once elegant buildings that now seem like relics from
more confident times.
2 comments:
How perfectly revealing that, when you undertook the act of recording/criticising the passively offensive mini-pavilion, the disingenuous façade of cheer immediately switched to a threatening security protocol, all undoubtedly captured on their CCTV.
There is a barely suppressed paranoia in everyone's actions in there. The people who loiter by the door asking you if they can pay a cheque in are basically making sure that you're in there for vaild reasons. Nonetheless, as you say, it's the cheeriness that really grates.
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